BY SOPHIE LLOYD ON 5/24/23 AT 10:08 AM EDT

Awoman who told her stepsister “no one cared” about her wedding is being cheered online.

Sharing her story with the Reddit forum Am I the A******?, user u/notyourwedding_032 explained that she is getting married this summer. Her 27-year-old stepsister “Maggie” married last year and is constantly comparing the bride-to-be’s plans with her own celebration—causing u/notyourwedding_032 to snap at a family gathering.

“All I intended was to make Maggie think twice before making these kinds of comments. Not to make some kind of value judgment on her existence,” the 23-year-old told Newsweek.

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The confrontation took place during a dinner that was also attended by the bride-to-be’s father and stepmother Miranda—Maggie’s mother—plus members of the extended family.

The group was discussing her wedding, which is very different in “terms of venue, size, aesthetic” to her stepsister’s. Still, Maggie has been comparing them “incessantly” and is also bitter that her stepfather’s family didn’t attend her wedding—even though they are not close.

Everyone ignored Maggie’s comments until she suggested that the engaged couple are entering into an “arranged marriage”—and receiving special treatment as a result.

Exhausted by the sniping, the bride-to-be told Maggie that “no one cared about your wedding a year ago, and they’re not going to start today, so please just spare us.”

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Reddit users applauded her sass, giving her post 6,000 upvotes.

James Miller, a psychotherapist and host of self-development and wellbeing radio show LIFEOLOGY® Radio, said rivalry was common among step siblings, especially if parents or other family members pigeonhole or sideline the children.

“Siblings in unfavorable roles will often resent the ones who are cast in a positive light,” he told Newsweek.

Parents and families often pigeonhole children unintentionally, but the emotional impact can last well into adulthood. This is particularly true if the biological child is clearly favored or the stepchild is left out of family activities.

Although setting boundaries with toxic relatives can help, accepting that your family is the issue—not you—is the first step towards healing. “Regardless of which role you are cast in, you have to find your own identity and self-worth,” Miller said.

Notyourwedding_032 was 11 years old when her father married Miranda, but spent most of her childhood living with her mother. Although she and Maggie got along fine until recently, there have long been issues between Miranda and her father’s extended family.

Miranda is a “very sensitive person,” the Redditor wrote, and decided early in her marriage that her new husband’s family disliked her. She began to avoid group functions. As a result, Miranda and Maggie are not close to the extended family and they did not attend Maggie’s wedding.

“This has softened over the years, but I still get the impression that Miranda is very much looking for an opportunity to feel slighted,” the 23-year-old wrote.

Maggie seems to have inherited her mother’s attitude. She is resentful that notyourwedding_032’s father offered to pay for the wedding, even though the couple declined, and that the bride-to-be is being given heirloom jewelry for her big day.

She also had a crush on the fiancé as a teenager, and finds it hard to believe he chose notyourwedding_032 over her. She accused their family of arranging the marriage and purposefully “skipping her.”

This isn’t true, the bride-to-be explained. “My fiancé is very close to my family, as has been for a long time.

“He has a lot of shared business interests with my family, and while this has nothing to do with our relationship, the family is very happy that we’ve worked out.”

After notyourwedding_032’s “no one cared” retort, there was an awkward silence at the table. Maggie left in tears and headed home. Her father has told the poster to apologize, but she refuses.

“It felt like she was using my important life event to draw attention to herself which felt unfair and mean spirited, which is why I reacted the way I did,” she said.

Reddit users voted notyourwedding_032 “not the a******” in the situation.

“She is jealous because OP is getting more attention on her wedding than she did on hers,” posted Golden_Wolf_TR.

“Constantly complaining about a family who you have had nothing to do with not coming to your wedding is an a****** move,” wrote HailYourself966.

“Believing she was entitled to OP’s fiancé due to ‘being closer in age’? I can’t call that anything short of delusional,” commented OrcaMum23.

The bride-to-be told Newsweek that, unfortunately, the situation has not improved since she posted on Sunday.

“My dad is still pushing for an apology to keep the peace,” she said. “I’m not sorry for what I said, but how I said it.”